*waits for 911 to call me first so i don’t sound thirsty*
HAHA fuck literally me
He’s holding is little hands like, “umm kind sir I’m back… i… is it ok if I get some more nuts? If not that’s ok I’m just hungry”
idk why ppl act like funny women are a rare precious commodity when every woman i know is a got damn comedian and i’ve met maybe two intentionally funny men in my lifetime
"I think Bigfoot is blurry, that’s the problem. It’s not the photographers’ fault. Bigfoot is blurry and that’s extra scary to me. There’s a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside."